Sunday, April 1, 2012

Lonely Bumble Bee

This house was old and had a toilet in the front yard. My ex boyfriend was to drop me off. One of my friends was supposed to be meeting me here. He promised he would take care of me at the party. "He will be here soon, you can go home" I pleaded with my ex to not come inside with me. He refused to allow me to go to a party where I knew no one dressed the way I was. It was Halloween and I had bought the costume weeks before not knowing where or when I'd even wear it. The picture on the package showed a tall girl in stripper heals. It seemed like the dress part would go down to my lower thigh but in reality it was much too short. Bright yellow and black stripes circled around my body. I had bouncing glittery wings that left little glitter presents wherever they touched. My ensemble was complete with a black stinger and headband with wire yellow antennas. "Fine, you can come in until my friend gets here" I compromised.

Bass from the stereo thumbed in my chest and head. I couldn't hear anyone talking to me. I vaguely introduced myself to people around the dank kitchen. Drinks were being mixed up and served out in glowing cups. A vampire offered me one. I took it to the living room where people were lounging around and smoking. We started playing truth or dare.

I downed an entire cup full of cola and liquor, stood up, and did a curtsy. Everyone cheered and thought that was incredible. Laughter filled the living room and more people came to see what was happening. Others joined in the game. Still no sign of my friend.

My fingers were drunk and I couldn't keep a hold of my phone to text my friend. My head was spinning. I yelled at my ex to figure it out for me. The responding text message said that my friend was not going to be coming to this party. Nobody there was familiar to me safe from my ex. We had been together for about a year. He told me he would be stupid to let me break up with him so he promised to be my friend until I changed my mind back. He was sober. Word got around that I was chugging hard alcohol like a pro. More people poured into the living room with drinks and bets to see who could drink faster. There were many people I out drank. Problem was, the more I won the drunker and more disoriented I became.

"We should leave" My ex yelled towards my ear. "Why?! It's just starting to get fun!" I hollered back in his face.

My foot slipped in the wet grass by his car. He had to help me in and buckle my seat belt. We started driving. Lights and cars flew past my window in a blur. I felt like we were traveling at hyper speed towards death. I kept screaming to slow down we are going to fast. My stomach filled and throbbed. My mouth started to prepare for the inevitable. Hot fizzy vomit rushed forward and out my nose. I tried to hold it back and put my hands up over my face. We pulled over at a gas station. He marched me in the front door past security cameras and to the back restroom. "Wash your face and hands, go pee and come back out."

The bathroom floor had a crazy design on it that messed with my head. The pattern danced wildly below my feet. I vomited again on the toilet. The sink only had ice cold water. I loaded up on soap and washed vigorously making squealing sounds as my skin froze.

When I marched back out to the front my ex was laughing with the guy standing at the counter. I heard them say that I was drunk and going home.

Darkness started creeping into my head in the car. The engine was loud. My body felt limp and helpless. Double racing seat belts held me tight but I felt like I'd be thrown from the car. "I think I'm passing out, don't let me die" I started crying.

Bright light poured over my face when the car finally stopped. I looked around for a moment but couldn't recognize where we were. My head was pounding and my eyes burned. A blurry figure came at me from the passenger window. My ex opened the door and un-belted me. I just stared vaguely up at him without saying a word. The trees were blurry green waving in the background. I could smell his cologne when his shirt was pressed to my face. My body was weightless in his arms and then darkness overcame me. I was falling and spinning away into the abyss. "Look what I found" I heard as we went over the threshold. Darkness again.

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